Musings on Tim Urban's "The Tail End" (link below)
The "tail end," as in, putting our entire lifetime into perspective: the tail end of time together with parents (if they’re still with us), with siblings, with friends.As in…maybe we can only count on one hand or two how many more days we spend with these people.
As in, maybe we’re running out of time.
A snippet from Urban's article:
“Relationships. I’ve been thinking about my parents, who are in their mid-60s. During my first 18 years, I spent some time with my parents during at least 90% of my days. But since heading off to college and then later moving out of Boston, I’ve probably seen them an average of only five times a year each, for an average of maybe two days each time. 10 days a year. About 3% of the days I spent with them each year of my childhood.Being in their mid-60s, let’s continue to be super optimistic and say I’m one of the incredibly lucky people to have both parents alive into my 60s. That would give us about 30 more years of coexistence. If the ten days a year thing holds, that’s 300 days left to hang with mom and dad. Less time than I spent with them in any one of my 18 childhood years.When you look at that reality, you realize that despite not being at the end of your life, you may very well be nearing the end of your time with some of the most important people in your life . . . it turns out that when I graduated from high school, I had already used up 93% of my in-person parent time. I’m now enjoying the last 5% of that time. We’re in the tail end.It’s a similar story with my two sisters. After living in a house with them for 10 and 13 years respectively, I now live across the country from both of them and spend maybe 15 days with each of them a year. Hopefully, that leaves us with about 15% of our total hangout time left.The same often goes for old friends. In high school, I sat around playing hearts with the same four guys about five days a week. In four years, we probably racked up 700 group hangouts. Now, scattered around the country with totally different lives and schedules, the five of us are in the same room at the same time probably 10 days each decade. The group is in its final 7%. So what do we do with this information?”
*****
I don't know, honestly, what to do with this information.
My parents are already long gone.
My siblings and in-laws are nearby but busy with their lives. Holidays are our best bet--one, maybe two a year?
My closest friends are nearby-ish, but like everyone, they're busy with their own lives and families.
My three adult children live out of town/out of state. We text frequently but see seldom each other. Maybe a few times a year, if we plan well.
My (so far) one and only grandson lives out of state. He's already walking and causing all kinds of mayhem which I see in pictures and videos. I'm missing out. Should I up and move?
It's the tail end of time.
And I'm running out of it.
*****
The Tail End, by Tim Urban (Wait But Why)
